I grew up watching this commercial, and I believed it. What a scam.
Is Perfect Life Balance Possible?
What is life balance anyway? It is definitely not achieving all the things you want in life at the same time.
I once had a friend pull me aside for advice. She told me she needed to start working again. She had three kids at home. However, she didn’t want her new job to affect or change her life in any substantive way. “I don’t want to be stressed”, she said. “I don’t want to be tense helping the kids with homework at night or overwhelmed in any way.”
She wanted my advice as to whether she could still keep everything the same and not be stressed after work.
I told her, and I quote, “There is no freaking way that that is going to happen. Something’s Gotta’ Give.”
See, when clients ask for advice, I cut out the “freaking” part and stick to professional lingo. But, like I said, she is a friend. What I wanted her to know is that she was going to have to cut out things to make way for this life change. Perfect life balance is not possible.
Give Away Girls tend to cut out what they want and need first. That is a recipe for trouble. So, I developed what I call the Conscious Calendar.
The Conscious Calendar
- Spend one day a week where you regularly set time aside to plan out the rest of your week. I like Sunday.
- Start your week calendar by putting in something that is important to you, like cleaning out your closet or going for a run.
- Keep these goals small and reachable. We are not going for perfection here, just a lil’ time for yourself.
- Then put everybody else next.
- What has to be cut out for you to keep yourself in a good space?
- Will anyone die if you cut those things? Then go ahead.
Give Away Girl Takeaway: It is called the Conscious Calendar because Give Away Girls tend to start the list with everyone else. They unconsciously neglect their needs or put them aside. If you don’t plan for getting your needs met, they will invariably get boxed out and you will feel bitchier.
Maybe you switch from having your house perfect to making sure just the kitchen and your bedroom is always clean. Or, maybe you don’t go out for date night every week but make it every other week so you can go for a run. Maybe you request that your partner take up more slack or at least give him or her the second shift one night a week and CLEAR OUT by 6pm. If you don’t have a partner, set up a regular week night where the kids have a quick dinner and they spend time in their rooms while you chillax.
It is tough, but make sure self neglect isn’t in the forefront of your decisions. Not taking care of yourself is very dangerous for your emotional and physical health. Additionally, it is dangerous modeling for the little ones. (They always end up doing what they see, remember?)